"you don't know how old you are"

I think I talked with my mom yesterday about six times. Seriously.

THe strangest part? That's not even abnormal for us! We are both contending with little ones so what could be one semi-long convo easily becomes a series of abruptly ending (although not finished) conversations.

"sorry, babe. I need to get off the phone. Joshy is scaling up the railings on the front porch. Call you right back!" She calls back minutes later after filling me in on how she just saved his daring three year old butt from plunging eight feet into a certainty of broken bones. The explanation is followed by her picking up wherever she had let off..

then Cohen wakes and is screaming.. "Mom, can I call you back after I nurse Cohen?"

"Sure, sweetie. I need to get dinner on anyway..call me later."

I nurse my ferocious infant and call back, all the while, trying to remember exactly where we had stopped an hour ago. (I am not as practiced at this life-with-kids constant interuption as she is! *grin*) I have to call three tmes to get her because she forgot to turn up the volume on her phone or left it in her purse or just 'hates technology'. By this time its evening and Joe and Josh are in bed, although not asleep...I am bouncing Cohen on my hip and walking around the house so he won't get fussy and start screaming. We pick up the same conversation for about the third time since 10am. WE get a little further this time before Cohen explodes and I have to get off the phone to clean orange goo off the both of us. I call back and Joe is now awake telling Mom he can't go to sleep because he is having nightmares...I can hear her explaining to him that nightmares happen when you are asleep and are not things that keep you from sleeping...(he's always thnking up some reason to not go to bed!)

Its usually by this time... the last call of the night..that Mom says something really profound. Last night she repeated something she heard her Pastor say...

"You don't know how old you are. I mean, Kate, I could be really young if I live until I am 90...but who knows? Maybe I will get sick and die in a year...and then I would be really old. You know?"

My sweet, amazing, wonderful younger sister recently got engaged to someone a bit older than she is and for some people, the age gap is 'weird'. I won't say much about it other than this (get ready, its my 'official statement' *grin*):

I love Shane. I love Beth. THey love God more than each other and each other more than anyone else. I have ALWAYS known Beth to do the thing she really believes is God-ordained no matter how difficult or how much other people don't understand. SO, I trust that their upcoming union truly is from God and I couldn't be happier for the both of them.

Anyway, the reason I bring it up is that is was the context of Mom's words.... and although I think her point was possibly the best I have heard on the whole 'age i just a number' debate, it really hit me in a different way.

I start thinking about our life here....Shawn and Cohen and I's. I started thinking about how I just plug on day after day, assuming we are young...that I am young...not considering that I don't know how long we have.

..or how old we are.

So this morning, I am opting to start thinking about my life in a new light...to not just assume I can put off important things because "I have time"...I am reminded of a verse in one of the first chapters of Proverbs that says "don't put off until tomorrow the good thing you can do today".

God put something in my heart a couple of days ago... to write a letter to someone I love...someone who has been a main character in my life...someone who has influenced and encouraged me in a way few have... someone, who in recent days, has become awkwardly distant.

And instead of having good intentions, I am going to write that letter. Today.

Rich Mullins once wrote in a song "Live like you'll die tomorrow/Die knowing you'll live forever/Live right"

Good words for someone who doesn't know (truly) how old they are.